Gold
at the center of me like
a crystal.
Shining
Like the essence of everything,
it’s
Ineffable.
but it seems dead
covered in copious reams of shit–
just rancor,
fecal matter
a lair for filth
layered thick and deep
just stinking
reeking…
And my whole life I’m
just reeling around
its seeping,
Until I
bravely
begin poking,
revolting,
just wanting to down it,
to drown it.
But – really –
while dragging the dredges away from this
– just perfect-
– just golden-
center that wants to stay hidden–
It straight sucks the garbage back in like sticky quicksand
and
It feels impossible to dispose of
…really…
…all along…
what is it that hides splendor in degradation?
I ask
And I find it is None,
but ourselves…
I’m the extruder of disconnection.
The divorcer from the divine
Who needs to own it
to recognize that it’s mine
I’m the one who created it….
Spewed it out in lost lies.
You cannot push away your self from your self.
You know.
So, the labor of love,
The trek into the abyss,
The facing down of shadowed demons
Begins.
I take each piece of crumbling horror
and polish it, love it, and learn what it told me that I forgot…
What we all forgot.
And when I get to the crystallized gold at the core,
I’ll hold it up for you to see
The light
Overpoweringly brilliant
Infinite splendor
Pouring forth
Poignant reminder
of what we can be
When we remember.
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